How to Crochet a Cheezburger: Part II

So, we’ve already seen How to Crochet a Hamburger Bun. Now, I take you to Part II of this endeavor: How to Crochet Lettuce, and How to Crochet a Slice of Cheese. One is significantly easier than the other.

How to Crochet a Piece of Lettuce

– Begin crocheting a circle, as in How to Crochet a Hamburger Bun.
– Perform increase rows until there are 4 sc between each increase st.
– Begin hyperbolic plane crochet: 2 sc into each st around
– Your circle will quickly begin to fold on itself. I wish I could tell you how many of these crazy increase rounds I worked, but I can’t — just keep on a-doin’ them until your lettuce is of sufficient size. 2sc in each st, around and around.
– For fun lettuce-y edging, you will do a crab stitch. To do this: everything is as in normal sc, EXCEPT that you will be moving left to right. So, you know how when you normally crochet you insert your hook into the st to the left of what you just completed? Instead, insert it into the st to the right of the one you just completed, and perform the st as normal. It’s funny and backwards (hence “crab st”), but will give you a little more texture on the outside of your lettuce. Work this all the way around.
– Fasten off. Admire your synthetic photosynthetic creation.

How to Crochet a Slice of Cheese

– Ch 17, plus one for turning st.
– Sc across. Perform turning ch if you wish. I rarely do.
– Sc back and forth until you have a square. Fasten off.
– This will curl at the edges, as sc is wont to do. That’s cool. It makes the cheese look melty.

Tomorrow, the cheezburger saga will conclude with Part III: How to Crochet a Cheezburger Patty and How to Crochet a Slice of Tomato. Some assembly required.

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How to Crochet a Cheezburger: Part 1

Being a Lolcat for Halloween was really fun. Some people had no idea what I was, to which I replied, “Well, it’s this internet phenomenon… pictures of weird cats with silly captions… cats like cheezburgers…” and received questioning stares. But! Those who recognized my costume were really stoked.

Regardless, everyone loved the crochet cheezburger. That’s right. I crocheted a cheezburger for my Halloween costume.

Needless to say, this was a test of my crochet skills. Also of my stamina, as I was up until 2 in the morning the night before Halloween. I chose to crochet my cheezburger instead of knitting it because crochet offers more possibilities as a structural element — while knitting offers better drape for garments, I think, crochet is great for constructing an object because each stitch is a little bit like a Lego. Crocheted fabric is also stiffer, which means it holds up well in a toy.

All the yarn used for this was Cascade 220, my absolute favorite yarn. The yarn’s cheap, comes in a wide variety of colors, and is an all-around great yarn to work with. Also, I always have many colors of it in my stash.

So, today, I’ll post on how to crochet the top and bottom hamburger buns for the cheezburger (the correct kitteh spelling of “cheeseburger”). Tomorrow, I’ll fill you in on how to crochet the lettuce, cheez/cheese, patty, and tomatoes.

Here goes!

Top Hamburger (or Cheeseburger or Cheezburger) Bun

Piece 1 of Top Bun:
– Ch 3.
– Sl st to first chain to create a small circle.
– 8 sc into 3-ch circle. 8 st.
– Increase: 2 sc in each sc around – 16 st.
– *2 sc in one sc, sc* around (you are increasing every other st) – 24 st.
– *2 sc in one sc, sc, sc* around (you are increasing every third st) – 32 st.
– Continue in set pattern, increasing 8 stitches every round, increasing the number of sc between each inc st until there are 6 st between each of your inc stitches – 64 st.
— To clarify, the last inc round you do will be *2 sc in one sc, sc 6x* around
– Work 4 round even
– Fasten off.
Piece 2 of Top Bun:
– Same as for Piece 1, but do not work even rounds. Fasten off after last inc round.
Finishing the Top Bun:
– Embroider sesame seeds on larger part of bun using broken chain st (AKA lazy daisy st).
– Whipstitch top and bottom pieces of top bun together, leaving a small hole at the end through which to stuff — I used cotton balls!
– Pretend to eat your new bun.

Bottom Hamburger (Cheeseburger, Cheezburger) Bun

– Proceed as though making Piece 2 of Top Bun.
– After finishing last inc round, do not fasten off; instead, work one round even but through the back loop only. This will give you a little bit of a turning row.
– Work 3 rounds even.
– At this point, cut out a circle of cardboard that is slightly smaller than the base of your cheezburger bun. This wil stabilize the bottom.
– Begin working decrease rows; on the first row, again work through back loops only.
– Decrease: *(Insert needle into next st and pull through a loop that stays on your hook, repeat into following st giving you three loops on your hook; finish sc by pulling a loop through all three loops on hook, thereby decreasing one st but not leaving a hole in your work), sc 6x* around
– Continue to decease with one less sc b/t dec sts. When you are getting smaller, put cardboard in bottom. Continue to decrease until you have a very small hole — stuff the bottom bun at this point. Do final decreases until you are down to as few sts as comfortable.
– Note: Pull yarn tight during these steps, as it will be a little bit of a struggle to decrease the circumference this quickly.
– Use crochet hook to close up final hole — this does not need to be neat, as it will be hidden inside your cheezburger.

Success!

Weave in all ends and pat yourself on the back. Begin to get excited about cheezburger fixin’s.

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Can Has Halloweeeeeeen?

Enjoy, y’all:

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